Leaving the cage

Today I braved an adventure into the world. 

Over the past year, as the depth of my depression hit new heights and struck without rhyme or reason, I eliminated all parts of my life outside work and home. The world, socializing, shopping, fitness – too much of a risk. They all could trigger a crash. It seemed like everything could.

Oh, I am bipolar? Isolation won’t protect from my terrifying mood dives? Crashes weren’t caused my outside stimulus? Yet I retain all my fears of the world. I’m not sure it is over. The sadness still sneaks through at times. Weekends are spent cowering in my home. 

Not today. Today I went to the gym. 

Small and pathetic but a step. Much of my former life was sacrificed to the this illness. 

Regardless, progress. Progress.

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Leaving the cage

5 thoughts on “Leaving the cage

    1. Thanks. I hate being proud of this. It is nothing. It disappointing that I am actually excited by small acts that others accomplish daily, they don’t even consider them accomplishments. However, I’ve put the bar so low it is in the sand.

      So yes, progress. And I’m glad I can celebrate it somewhere.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Hey. Be kind to yourself. Everyone doesn’t have to deal with what you have to deal with. And beating up on yourself won’t get you anything good. I say celebrate the victories, no matter how small! So YAY, dammit! πŸ˜€

        Liked by 1 person

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